Lazgah Concept Art

Almost a hundred and fifty pages into TCoU:B, and the characters are moving towards the dangerous swamplands of the Groar and Lazagah people.  This book is one of the slowest I’ve ever written. Although not boring, I will admit that it can be a little dry. But this is a large tale to tell, and as anyone who has read a 1000 page plus fantasy novel, it takes a good chunk of time before the fuckin’ wonder begins.

Anyway. Our heroes are leaving the canyon where the Creature was found. After a merciless slaughter of evil men and women by the demonic reach of Blestemul, they continue on into the bizarre volcanic swamps, headed towards a Groar capitol, and then beyond. We’ve already discussed Groars here, but not the Lazgah are sentinents, true, but are too savage to be included in any type of modern society. Intelligent, but mostly in an instinctual and predatory sense, they have a basic language but mostly operate in tightly knit and organized troops. They are semi-amphibious, but don’t breathe through their skin. Heavily muscled, they have a bizarre anatomy the defies nature. Here’s a picture of some rough concepts:

And a closeup of the type of head I chose:



A few more concepts of the actual anatomy of a Lazgah:


They are adept scavengers and can often reverse engineer, or re purpose scavenged materials or technology. They can make surprisingly sophisticated weapons, favoring a super compressed blowgun tailored to exploit the advantages of having massive and powerful lungs. These darts are tipped in lethal poisons collected from creatures dwelling in their natural habitat. They are fond of throwing weapons, using their profound strength to throw such projectiles with incredible speed and force, far more than some human schmuck with a throwing knife. They will often utilize umbracells as volatile grenades, and as devastating traps. Here’s some concept art detailing Lazgah weapons:


And finally, some more advanced weapons found in the hands of Lazgah soldiers:



Okay, I’ll leave you with that. Got any questions? Comments? You know what to do.

Deletion as a Freeing Edit Move

I delete massive pieces of my work quite often.

I look back at what I wrote, and I find myself disgusted with my mediocrity. The way I remedy this is by removing myself from the piece and looking at it like I wasn’t its creator. I just wrote several pages of TCoU:B, and I realized they were all shit. I was bored reading them, and I was bored writing them. I was anxious to continue to the next part because I had set up the next part so well, but instead, I used a cheap cliffhanger trick that thousands of authors/writers (same?) use before me.

FUCK cliffhangers.

I deleted the shitty reading device and spat on its fuckin’ grave. I liquidated the filth from my body of work and watched it swirl the toilet bowl where shit belongs. I’m delving right back in where I want to be. Fuck, I figured if I as an author hated the cliffhanger I wrote, how would you feel if you read it? Undermined. Betrayed. Patronized. Belittled. Sometimes, delete. Don’t worry about rewriting, don’t worry about any of that shit. If something is garbage, throw it the FUCK out. Don’t give it a second chance. It’ll start to rot and stink, clouded and putrefying all the good writing you have done, and will do.

Anyway, the crew are headed to the story’s next scene, and they encounter a being that. Well. Why should I tell you?

I’ll post concept art of this being during the next post. As for plot details, I never reveal what I’m writing. I’ll always post concept art, how I arrived at certain conclusions or characters, but I don’t divulge anything else. I’m trying to decide if this practice is narcissistic, or ritualistic.

I’m tired of my own voice in my head so I’m gonna shut the fuck up now.



I did it. I fuckin’ did it. Geneslave is now available for a delicious 2.99 dollar price tag in the vast wonders of Kindlespace. I just uploaded the bastard now (04 June 2012: 16:47hrs), so it won’t be available for about 12-24 hours or so, but who cares? I got over the bullshit in my head, and I published my fuckin’ book!

I am not bragging. I am just ecstatic.

If you decide to buy my book, you will roughly pay 0.000025 cents a word. I did the math, bitch! Honestly? I don’t care if I make five fuckin’ dollars on this sonfabitch, it’s published, and I did it without the help of a formal, tangible copy publishing house, literary agent, independent editor, or lawyer. It’s copyrighted, protected, and READY to FUCKIN’ GO. Open your Kindle, and search for Geneslave. That’s it. You can also go on to purchase as well. AND you can get a muthafuckin’ KINDLE APP to read this bastard. Do it however you want!

In case you haven’t noticed yet, this isn’t about the money. Never was. Money is icing. This was me conquering the literary industry, and spitting in the faces of those who would shun my book because I didn’t have a shiny award, or because I didn’t know someone on the inside. And this isn’t just a victory for me! Oh no. This is a victory for real writers like me EVERYWHERE that has faced the same problems I have. The best part was it was EASY to upload this bastard! Easy! Formatting it was hard as Hell, but getting on Kindle was a cinch!

If you’re ready to publish, click this link. Once you set up an account to publish your book with Kindle, you just fill out a simple form and upload yer shit! It’s like starting up an e-mail account. I love it. I give a step by step guide on formatting and getting your book ready for Kindle in the archives of my blog if you need it by the way.

With that said, YOU. You can do this. You, the writer, the artist, the creative one, you can do this dammit, you can do this, and you can do this well! Get published! There is no more reasons as to why you can’t anymore. Your fate, no, a writer’s fate, is now something that can be controlled by the writer, like it should be. Start writing that masterpiece! Start formatting and publishing that manuscript that some ass sniffing literary agent wouldn’t accept. Publish that book that the publishing house wouldn’t print. Get out there and fucking write you ass off, and tell the whole goddamn world that I AM A WRITER, AND I EXIST.

It’s time to join the revolution.

Progress on Kindle and Concept Art

I’m back. Great vacation- got some good time with the lovely wife and some good times at a massive theme park. Enough of that, let’s get into the shit right away.

Before  post concept art, I want to tell you all something. I bit the progress bullet, stopped being a whiny bitch, and opened my Kindle account for selling my books. If you’re at this stage, you can click on this link. It was painless, and now? I can start uploading m’shit. And you’ll all be the first ones to know when I do. Setting up a Kindle publishing account is easy as fuck. It’s just like setting up an e-mail account. Also, make sure you have your social security card ready, too.

Alright, with that exciting (for me at least) announcement out of the way, I wanted to continue with the explanation of plasmatic weapons in TCoU:Blestemul. While I was forty thousand feet in the fuckin’ air, I came up with some pretty solid diagrams as to how actual rifle would look. The first picture (the one below) is an outdated version of what the weapon would look like. However, its parts are all current. You see, in Urth, there are bizarre new elements formed after the cataclysm. These elements allowed the technology for such energy weapons to exist (I will cover ALL the elements I “invented” in a later entry). Enough. Here’s the art:

These are the basic parts to what a standard E.A. rifle would look like. I didn’t think the look of the weapon felt right, though. It looked too…primitive. Too…fragile. Basic. I mean, pick an adjective it just don’look right. So, I tweaked it and came up with a final concept for a basic E.A. weapon found all over Urth. Take a look at this shit:

Much better. Here, I detailed the furniture of the weapon rather than the actual internal mechanisms n’ shit. A protruding barrel didn’t make any sense to me, along with a defined seating for the weapon’s guts. So, I made an all inclusive model that keeps everything contained, controlled, and monitored. I made it look more futuristic (for lack of a better term) to satisfy any sci-fi tech cravings I had at the time. I also included some specs on the weapon itself, like rate of fire, projectile effective range, and so-on.

Honestly? I’ve been trying to develop a competent weapon like this since I was 12. I am 26 now. Only recently did I find the real science and facts I needed to mutate and bend to my will. It ain’t easy being inside my head, and I don’t say that because I think I’m special or unique. I say that because I have O.C.D., or Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. Ideas, worries, thoughts, they are always smashing around in my skull, and the urge to constantly improve my fiction and make the ideas I present inside my work as plausible causes me to create something like this. Sometimes, I think talent is just another word for obsession. Do I consider myself talented? No. I’ve always seen myself as someone that loves the creative process so much, that I can’t stop doing it. Is that talent? Okay then. I’m talented. But I think a more appropriate term would be obsessed.

Alright then, another post down. I want FEEDBACK. You. Fucking. Tools. Speak up! Good and bad critique (as long as its constructive) will be read, considered, and responded to. Don’t be silent. Tell me I suck, or tell me I’m awesome, as long as you have an actual path of reasoning behind your opinion, I will not ignore it.

Inventing Plasma Weapons

One of my favorite things to do is create fictional science.

I absolutely love it. I like to take real facts, introduce a fictional variable, and then speculate on what would happen to a very normal object in a very abnormal situation. Weaponry in my latest novel, TCoU:B ranges from the standard cartridge fired out of a pistol, or rifle, along with pure plasma energy. Imagine hurling a searing hot bolt of plasma at your enemy, and watching him collapse in a heap of burns, screams, and fire. Also, I invented E.A. weapons, which stand for Energy Assisted. This is a solid slug wrapped in a comet of searing hot plasma. I have concept art, for this of course, but right now, I’m not going to talk about that. I’m going to talk about utilizing plasma as a weapon in an overview sense. I’ll get into extreme details later, I promise.

There are a few things that stop us (humanity) from using plasma in a weaponized bolt form. First, energy. We simply don’t have the amount of juice necessary to convert matter into plasma in a small, hand-held weapons system. Second, the tremendous heat thrown out by the weapon would melt the internal components and furniture of any weapon. Third, and unexpected, is brightness. Plasma throws out an enormous amount of energy that is straight-up photon. The user would be blinded completely as the bolt left the barrel of the firearm, along with anyone around him. And last, plasma oozes heat into its surroundings, making the bolt fizzle out long before it reaches its target. I have address each of these problems by adding a fictional element.

1. Energy

I created something called Umbrashard. It’s a common purple salt crystal found all over Urth that converts simple sunlight into enormous amounts of energy when properly refined and placed into battery form. I don’t mean a few gigawatts. I mean, terrawatts. Petrawats. That kinda shit. Fuck, an umbracell (the refined crystal placed into battery form) squirts out a few dozen gigawatts on a bad day. So, if this umbracell was used in a weapon, all the power in the world would be right there, in the palm of your hand. AND because of the unique crystalline structure promotes stable energy flow within Umbrashards promotes energy flow, allowing umbracells to be engineered to deliver the appropriate amount of juice for the task at hand without overloading into a massive plasma explosion. So, the fuel source is ready.

2. Heat

Plasma generated within the weapon would melt it with real world science. I introduced two Urth elements that correct this problem. Within the chamber of any plasmatic weapon there is a sophisticated circulation system that pushes a special gas into the weapon where the plasma is generated. This gas alters its temperature according to the amount of current one pours through it. The more juice you pump through the gas, the colder it gets. The best part is, you only have to do it once. The gas will never change its temperature unless it receives another jolt of energy. The element rushes into the reactor area, where the plasma is formed nanoseconds after the plasma has left the weapon and is on its way to the target. This cools the weapon before it has a chance to get incredibly hot, which also prevents warping. I’ll get into what these weapons are made of and how they fire later.

3. Light

Plasma is fuckin’ bright. Period. So, I had to remedy this somehow, and one day while I was on the shitter, I came up with something. Inside the weapon, there is a man-made lens that absorbs surrounding photons and converts a portion of them into a magnetic confinement bottle (more on this later). The lens isn’t a tangible lens. It’s a thin sheen of Blinthium, an abundant new Urth element. It is held in place by creating an alloy within a rapidly constricting vacuum, literally creating a metallic gas alloy that is so dense,  it can be shaped and held into place WHILE still being a gas. Plasma heats up the particles of the gas, passes through, receives its magnetic confinement bottle via rapid heat reaction with the Blinthium lens, flies out the weapon, and the Blinthium lens snaps back into place just before the delivery of the coolant, ready for use again. The result it a 90% reduction in visible photon energy, having it all converted into a magnetic confinement bottle via the photons’ own electromagnetic radiation through the thermal reaction with the modified Blinthium atoms in the lens.

4. Range

Remember that whole magnetic confinement bottle shit? Well, without that, the immense heat and photon energy of a plasma bolt would bloom out into the atmosphere and never reach the target. However, safe within the bottle, the plasma stays tight and dense, hitting the target with pinpoint accuracy. The bottle ruptures upon impact after interacting with the atoms of a solid surface, delivering the plasma successfully to the target.

WHOO! You think it was tough readin’ this shit? I’ve been working on this fuckin’ crap for years. Being inside my head blows, man. Well, sometimes.

Anyway, I think I’ll stop here. This is the basic overview of how a plasma weapon works in the TCoU:B universe. I’ll post my concept art for plasma weapons, along with a detailed overview of how a plasma weapon works, and what they’re made of, in the near future. I’m going on vacation for awhile, so I’ll write when I get back. Leave comments! I’ll answer them.


Whoo! I feel much better.

I am still wrestling with my demons, but for once, I’m starting to feel like I can actually win. I am writing again, and in my heart, I’m just not ready to pull Geneslave’s trigger. It’s not a fear of rejection, it’s not dejection, it’s just…I’m not ready. I should be. And I push myself to be, but sometimes, I just can’t do it. Laziness? The process is confusing to get it ready, but I must do it. Before this month is out, it will be done. I must also remember that I’m not the only one that this blog affects. I am under NO delusions that my words are read by MILLIONS, but I am sure that by writing and helping myself out, I can help other people out too. Even if I help one person, help them write and publish, I’ll feel some satisfaction.

That sounds so fuckin’ cliche and caked with cheap, processed word cheese.

What the fuck ever, I meant it. Any-the fuck-way, I’m done moping and whining and clutching my own dick like a fuckin’ stuffed animal. I’m writing in Blestemul again, and the words are starting to flow more evenly now thank Christ. I feel more and more comfortable with pushing Geneslave forward, too. I just gotta sit down, and start the process one day. But when I think about it, my gut drops and my heart shoots a gout of frost through my veins. THIS is irony, ladies and gentlemen, straight outta the Gift of the fuckin’ Magi by the Henry.

I start a site that cuts through all the bullshit of the publishing industry, and I wind up standing in my own way to get published. Well. At least I’m recognizing it and wanting to correct it. I worked too hard to Geneslave for it not to be shared. And it’s not just my work that I’m talking about. YOU have worked too hard on your own projects to let them sit and fester. Push forward. Don’t let yourself stand in your way like I am. And if you’re where I am at right now, I’ll be there for you, this blog will be there for you, everyone that reads it will be there for you, too. And at the risk of sounding mushy but fuck it, I have to remember that all these things are there for me, too.

Fuck you contentment. You’re the bane of personal development.

Writer’s Block and Breaking through the Wall

I hate it when I write myself in to a corner, and I do it way too often.

As I work on TCoU:B, I felt the story prodding along more and more. Eventually, I reached a point where it was becoming forced, and the pieces just didn’t fit. I wasn’t believing what I wrote, and if I don’t believe it, how can I expect others to? I can’t, you’re exactly right. I had my main characters taking a bus to their next location. A fuckin’ bus. What a lazy move on my part to push the story along. But, it was the only good thing that had come to mind.

I went to start writing today, and I stared at the last paragraph before trying to start a new one. I felt supreme frustration, and instead of punching my computer screen, I held Alt and pressed F4. Closed the fucker right away, and cursed the book. I said, “this shit stain will never get done,” and “fuck this stupid fuckin’ book,” and a whole host of other things. I literally just punched the wall to my left as I wrote this, remembering all the frustrated energy I had stored up. Just now, I slammed my fist on the desk.

I hate frustration. Nothing drives me to the point of no return like frustration. I don’t know how to handle it sometimes, so. Oh fuck this. You don’t wanna hear this shit.

Anyway, back to the matter at hand. I got up to take a shit and rearrange my balls (they’ve been bothering me all fuckin’ day) when inspiration suddenly struck me. I was missing another character. A character that was not only an integral part of the story, but a much needed plot device that would help move things along without cheating the reader. Suddenly, my story found its momentum again.

Fighting writer’s block is a strange thing. It’s like wrestling with something in the dark. It doesn’t feel, smell, or look familiar. All you know is that it’s there and you hate it just as much as it hates you. I picture it as a strange little fucker, laughing and pointing at me, begging me to lash out and strike it. But no matter how many times I try, I can’t hurt it with conventional means.

I’m getting pissed as I type just thinking about that little fuckin’ cunt. Instead, I delete shit. I had six pages of fluffy, reader-insulting mind garbage that I highlighted and deleted from my book. It was like puking up poison and watching it swirl down the toilet; I felt so much better. And the little cunt stopped laughing at me, knowing it was beaten.

So, my story is back on track because I stopped thinking about writing the story, and started thinking about how to move it forward. Writing a novel and moving the story forward are two very different things. Any putz and walk off the street and shove a novel up their ass and sneeze out a shit stained bag of crap on paperback. But it takes a true author (I’m not the only, nor the last one) to move the story along. That’s what works for me. I stop thinking, start acting, and enjoy deleting. And, I’ll have concept art for a new character soon! Yaaaaaay!

How do you deal with writer’s block? Artist’s block? Do you picture it as an entity, or keep it as a metaphor? Speak up motherfuckers, I’m tired of your silence.

TCoU: Blestemul Concept Art for a Demon

How do?

TCoU: Blestemul, my next novel, is going along nicely so far. I’m at a little bit of a lull point in the story, you know where you have to build shit up before you bring the axe down? But hey. I’ll get through it, you’ll get through it, and then the good stuff will happen. Anyway, without revealing too much of the story, Blestemul is a very unique demon that shape shifts according to what instrument it can do the most damage with in conjunction with its chosen host (Alistar Crowne, the main character of TCoU:B in this case). It is a demon of pure rage and violence, but is surprisingly smart and sometimes supportive in times of need. Blestemul is what makes Alistar’s “quest” possible, which I will not reveal.

I went through a LOT of different concepts for this fuckin’ thing. I mean a lot. More than what you see here. I needed to get the perfect melding of beast and gun metal to make this thing look right. I wanted something sinister, but not completely without familiar qualities. I also wanted something that was much more than just an enchanted gun. If you’ve ever played the video games Shadowman, Devil May Cry, or Shadows of the Damned, I didn’t want this stylish weapon that looked cool and made a big racket. I wanted something that reflect a demon’s true form. Blestemul (which is Romanian forcurse) fit the bill. Also, if you played Shadows of the Damned, I didn’t copy the talking gun. In fact, I was quite pissed when I found my idea thrown out there already, but its my fault for not moving when I should have. Anyway, here’s one of three sketches I did for Blestemul:

I was having a little trouble with the overall form here. And Blestemul looked too…inorganic. So, I tried to change this up a bit and add more demon meat to the pistol’s furniture. I also removed the clip- it just didn’t fit into what I was trying to create. Here’s number two of three:

Now I have too much organic, and not enough metal. I was supremely frustrated at this point, and I’m pretty sure I took a break before I took another crack at it. If you’re an artist, there is nothing more frustrating when you’re trying to complete a piece than to watch it mutate into an image that was not in your head. Here’s the third and final picture, and Blestemul’s true form:

That’s what I’m talkin’ about. Here, I decided to add a gaping maw at the muzzle. Quite literally, this is where an odious and long tongue shoots out from under the weapon to grab, crush, and shove enemies and obstacles aside. If Blestemul really wants to get nasty, the demon reels in his victim, and the weapon’s mouth expands for a bone shattering chomp that is fatal and degrading. The tongue is not only a weapon. It is prehensile, meaning Alistar can using it like a grappling hook, and it can get “sniff” the air like a snake to see if there is anything of interest around. Also, it can be used to molest a target which saps the very life out of their bodies (if the abuse continues), reads their minds and memories, and makes them sick (Blestemul’s saliva is thick and yellowish green, like mucus) via slow poisoning. Symptoms include migraine, vomiting, fever, aches, severe hallucinations (auditory, visual, olfactory), and death if the dose is high enough.

Blestemul has a unique personality which is an ongoing development in progress. Many demons are stereotypically liars and deceivers. So is Blestemul, but he is also honest and supportive when he needs be. He is a tormentor, even to Alistar, as well as a valuable ally. He is a contradiction, constantly weaving all around him into a web of lies and truth, love and hate, anger and peace, that only he can read and understand. And let me tell you, it is FUN. To write as Blestemul.

Alright, that’s all for now I think. Comments? Questions? Lay em’ on me, you know I’ll answer. Got any characters you love to write for? Draw? Let me know.

Final Cover Preview: Geneslave

I finished it!

I was worried initially about how this cover would come out, but I am pleased. This is what the cover will look like when I finally upload this sucker to Kindle and get it ready for the market. Take a look:

I am very proud of this. I don’t care what anyone says. Doesn’t mean I don’t want feedback, but I am happy with this piece and how it will tie in with the novel as a whole. On standard sketchpad paper, I used HB pencil, 0.1mm black marker, and watercolors. Oh, and not the expensive shit. This was done on a budget. Goes to show you that you can make something you’re proud of with your own two hands and not have to abide by anyone’s rules. Does that mean what I do is right for you? No, of course not. Do whatever you want. But if you’re like me? There is something satisfying and vindictive about doing whatever the flying FUCK you want when it comes to creative control of your own work.

Enougha that shit. I don’t know when I’ll get it ready for Kindle- I’m shooting for this week. But when I do, you’ll be the first to hear about it. Oh, I may be posting stuff for Blestemul in between now and then, so stay turned for that too. Keep writing, signing, playing, drawing, painting, dancing, punching, eating, bathing, flipping, and fucking, do what you want and do it well. Just do it responsibly.

As always ALL forms of serious feedback is welcomed. I will respond to your comments.

Cover Art: Geneslave

Hello again.

My other job was calling, and if I didn’t answer, then well. I’d be fucked. But, you aren’t reading this for excuses, and I shall not give them to you. If you’ve been wondering why I haven’t pulled the trigger on Geneslave, it’s not because I’ve lost my nerve. Quite the opposite, actually. I’ve been developing a cover for the book that I would upload to the document when I Kindlefy it and get her ready for the market. I have a habit of rushing into things that I am excited about, and when I look back, I realize that things are missing. So. My wife suggested the development of a cover. At first, I was resistant. I wanted to put Geneslave out and I wanted to put it outnow. But, she helped me calm myself and look at the bigger picture. I thought about doing a cover, but I didn’t want to spend the time on it. Now, I’m glad I did. Here’s what I have so far, and I’ll keep posting the cover as I work on it more and complete it.

I know what you’re thinking. This motherfucker needs to hire an illustrator. And you’re right. But, the first and foremost problem is I can’t afford one. And I need one that will have the same level of passion for Geneslave as I do, and that’s hard to find free. That, and I’m starting to see why it’s important for me to draw the cover myself. This entire endeavor has mostly been under my steam. A good 95% of it if not more, and you know what?I don’t want someone else drawing the cover to my first published work. So whether it sucks the dick, or blows the gods, I’m making my own cover. What about you?

Do you illustrate? Would you illustrate a work you’ve created? Do you think about the cover art to your novel? Let me know, I’d like to hear about it.