Feeding the World with one Word…

…cannibalism.

Meat is a problem. Humans eat too much of it, and I’m not talking about health, economics. I’m focused on the impact it has on the planet. Food, water, space. Animal waste, hormones, gene therapy, antibiotics. All of this stemmed from one thing: demand. Bigger animals, more animals. More space, more resources to grow more animals for consumption. All the while, our resources dwindle. Instead of simply breeding more chickens, cows, pigs, etc humans could simply eat one another.

First things first. No more breeding factory farm animals- we liquidate our meat supply globally and start exporting our dead to one another at bulk rates according to meat quality. Of course, there are many other things that we rip off of animal bodies, but I say to you: leather, bone, teeth, milk, meat, hair can all be obtained from humans. And at a cheaper price. As far as human diet and health goes, who cares? Humans will eat anything, even if it is blatantly bad for them. We consume shit tons of red meat, fatty organ delicacies, processed meats, meat snacks, for Christ’s sake. We eat this shit (quite literally) but we turn our nose up at eating our own dead? Fucking ridiculous.

Screw the whole IT IS FORBIDDEN thing. Why? Who said? Why are you opposed to it? Probably because it’s been drilled into your head for decades that it is wrong. Disgusting. Violating. But what of the other animals? Are we not killing them and eating them too? Isn’t it accepted that meat is delicious? Of course it is. It’s just marketing.

You mean to tell me there isn’t some sleazy fuck out there in the ad business that couldn’t sell human fuckin’ meat products to the average human? Hell, he (of course it’ll be a male) could probably start in America- we’ll buy anything for any amount. In reality, how long do you think it would take if someone created a propaganda and ad campaign promoting cannibalism? Imagine if celebrities endorsed the act? The answer is not long.

All it takes is one nation. Others will follow because that’s what humans do. And if they don’t, so what? It doesn’t matter.

We’d assign grades and prices according to how the human corpse was attained, and its condition pre-consumption. Senior citizens, for example, would receive a low grade, and be more affordable. Stringy, possibly diseased meat, poor taste. Good for stew, probably. Death from natural causes. And I am certain that if cannibalism was accepted, we would eat human meat at ANY. AGE. A baby dying at birth? A delicacy that you know some fuckin’ asshole would pay for . A teenager who had a freak heart attack? Excellent stir fry meat. A twenty something, cut down in his/her prime by a hit and run? Thick, juicy steaks. A 40 year old that died on the plastic surgery table? Ground meat for burgers. We could also use the fat from morbidly obese corpses to render down as lard for cooking, like in a deep fryer. Fresh corpses could be donated exclusively to feed the hungry.

Human corpses could be pulled from natural disasters, botched surgeries, freak accidents. Those that are murdered, executed, or die of natural causes. Imagine how much meat we’d have if we purged the world’s violent criminals from prisons and executed them for consumption? Suicides, plane crashes, car accidents. People fuckin’ die all the time because there are people EVERYWHERE. Fuck, all the waste products could be used to make SlimJims, hotdogs, salami, pepperoni, sausage. We could revolutionize the way we think about meat, animal/human rights, agriculture. We’d be a whole new species, a whole new planet. More space, more trees. No factory farms, less animal waste, less pollution. All within our grasp.

The only problem I can see here is the cultural taboo. You see, humans can walk into a foodstore to visit the rotisserie, where no doubt dozens of chickens are being roasted all at once. They can look at this wall of spinning corpses and say, “Wow, that’s a lot of food! Looks delicious..,” Even though they are looking at literally dozens of bodies, each once possessed a life, personality, and dignity. But if we saw a wall of spinning human thighs or torsos, it is horrifying. Shocking. What’s the difference? None.

Humans are weak. Period. We follow what the TV says, and all I’m saying is that this world is one extreme idea away from complete and total change- good or bad. Think about it.

 

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