These last few weeks have been…trying. I make no apologizes for the things I’ve neglected. Including myself and this blog, my mind has been elsewhere. Sandy shoved a fist in many people’s holes last week, and fortunately, all she did to me and my wife was some light BDSM. Needless to say, I’ve been elsewhere.
I have been writing though. But I’ve noticed something more and more as I progress in life and work on books and other pieces. My emotions and state of mind drastically alter what happens in my books, and what I’m willing to do to the reader and/or characters. Maybe I’m just having a little dick power trip, maybe I’m an artist, I don’t fuckin’ care/know. All I know is I want to write more when I’m in the shit, and what I write gets affected.
Violence and cruelty show up more in my work. I also notice an inability to write good dialogue, and a nagging itch to get to the next action sequence, or fight. Good moods produce good dialogue and shitty storytelling sometimes. Bad moods cut straight to the chase. I am a man of little patience and low self worth, so maybe it’s my own pathetic way of bullying a situation into something I can dominate and have control over. Hell, as long as what I write is good, who cares?
That’s not for me to judge. Is it?
Often I wonder what “famous” books would have turned out like if the author was a different person, or pissed off when writing a certain chapter. Often I wonder if book would have been better, or worse. Often I wonder…too often. What does your storytelling tell you?
I find I only write well when I’m highly emotional, either it be pissed off, super upset, or frustrated. That’s when the words come. Maybe it’s because I just need to get them out, and it’s better to have them form on paper than to be spoken out loud when they can’t be retracted? I don’t know, I just know that when I’m happy, I can never write anything worthwhile!
I get it. I TOTALLY get it. Thanks for the comment.
It’s interesting that you write about this, because lately over the past week I’ve been noticing that I’ve been writing less because I’ve had a lot on my mind (concerning a recent interview for a job I’m crossing my fingers I get). I’ve been so consumed by thoughts of all the things I’d have to do if I get the job and all the things i COULD do, and just like that my typical blogging routine just kind of fell by the wayside. Assuming I do get the position, I’ll have to figure out a happy medium.
It’s even STRANGER that you said that because I try an update once a week, and I’ve been so preoccupied that I’ve let things lax terribly, so I know exactly how you feel. Also, I know I’m late in replying to this, but I hope your job interview went well. If you wrote a post about it, I haven’t’ seen it yet. Please forgive any redundancy.